What We Never Say
by shadowpuff
Summary: Over the years Kara and Alex have learned to avoid certain topics. Topics that caused pain and heartache. Topics that they couldn't forgive each other about. But with Alex forgetting that Kara is Supergirl...


Title: What We Never Say

Fandom: Supergirl (2015)

Rating: T

Characters: Kara, Alex,

Summary: Over the years Kara and Alex have learned to avoid certain topics. Topics that caused pain and heartache. Topics that they couldn't forgive each other about.

But with Alex forgetting that Kara is Supergirl...

Disclaimer: I don't own Supergirl

0000

Kara stayed quiet as Alex started complaining about Supergirl again. It had been a constant argument between the two for a week now. As far as Alex remembered, Kara was nothing more than Supergirl's biggest supporter and normally that would stop the woman from going into complaining to such a degree, but today wasn't like that.

"She needs to stay out of the DEO's business, Kara," Alex said and she stalked to and fro in front of Kara.

"She's trying to help people, all people. And yes, sometimes that means her objective is going to overlap with yours," Kara said, trying to get the woman to see sense.

"She can't just do whatever she wants. She needs to be controlled," Alex said with a sneer- and wasn't that the ugliest she's ever seen her sister as- before stopping, "We wouldn't have this problem if she didn't convince us to let her take Non to Argo... We wouldn't have this problem if we had Kryptonite."

"Alex!" Kara half shouted in shock. She couldn't believe Alex was willing to use Kryptonite on her- on Supergirl, not after the first time she ended up at the DEO.

Kara still has nightmares of that day, back when she became Supergirl. Waking up, strapped to a table, the burning sensation of Kryptonite coursing through her body. It was what Eliza and Alex have always warned her about, being captured by some group to be experimented on.

Alex has always tried not to bring it up. Always trying to never insinuate that she wouldn't use Kryptonite on her... But now.

"That's not OK Alex," Kara said, about to stand up when the horrible look on Alex's face just turned worse.

"Lena refuses to give us any. I don't know what got into her," Alex said.

Kara did. After several days of first explaining, then anger and finally forgiveness, Lena had accepted that Kara was Supergirl. After all, it wasn't fair that she told Nia and not her best friend.

"We've been too soft on her these last couple of years. Maybe I should remind her that I've actually killed a Kryptonian," Alex said as she turned to Kara's kitchen, intent on getting a drink- completely missing the look of pain and horror on Kara's face.

Kara always accepted Alex- not to mention everyone else's- attitude towards Non, he did almost make Alex kill her, and they have talked about him a few times. Three, actually. Once, after Kara begged the DEO to get him professional help. The second time, when the psychologist said he was better and she could actually go visit him. And lastly when Kara convinced the DEO to let her take Non to Argo, so that he could face Kryptonian justice. And so that he was of Earth, causing several people to relax.

But Astra... Astra they avoided. They never even implied anything to do with Astra. And it wasn't just Alex that avoided the topic, but everyone in their circle of friends. The last person to bring up Astra was Brainy, and that was because there was never any record of what happened to her, and he only got through half the sentence before realizing he shouldn't even have mentioned the name.

But now Alex doesn't remember that. She doesn't remember that Astra was Kara's aunt. She doesn't remember the guilt she felt- or maybe she doesn't remember the reason for her guilt. She doesn't remember... Anything.

"Do you remember the look on her face?" Kara asked, hoping to bring back that guilt.

Alex paused, lowering the glass from her lips as her shoulder sank, "I remember... Supergirl trusted me, and J'onn didn't want her to lose that trust in me, so he took the blame... She was angry- furious with him... And when I told her the truth, she wasn't angry anymore, but I don't think she ever forgave me."

No. No, Kara never forgave Alex- has pushed the knowledge of what Alex did so far down that she can almost forget what she did, but she never forgave her. But she never, would never blame her, or tell people- especially not her mother- what she did. As far as anyone knew, as far as the official report said, J'onn killed Astra. Only the three of them-four if you count Non- knew the truth.

"But you said it's never interfered with your working with each other," Kara said as Alex came back to the couch after topping of her glass again.

"Yeah, but it's always been that issue between us... And I think it's slowly poisoned our relationship," Alex said.

Kara wasn't sure what to say about that- despite the fact that she knew it was true. There was always that underlining tension between them. Because they never talked about, never told each other their true feelings about the subject... Kara could never express the same anger towards Alex as she did J'onn, even though she still felt the same anger.

Kara had always been careful how she treated Alex, less she acted the same way she did when she was under red kryptonite. And while they talked about the issues between them after that... New ones have cropped up they never address.

That was both their faults.

Kara pulled her knees to her chest and looked to the ground, "You never regretted killing Astra," she said in half a whisper, soft enough that Alex had to lean in closer, "You regretted hurting m-Supergirl, but never the act of killing Astra."

"No, I didn't," Alex agreed, her voice clear, not soft like Kara's.

Kara squeezed her eyes closed, trying to stop the tears.

"Astra was the enemy," Alex continued, not looking at Kara, "We were at war- She needed to be stopped... I admit, it probably would have been easier to deal with Myriad if Astra was alive- pretty sure she would have stopped Non from trying to blow up our brains- but at the time... She was going to kill J'onn, the last link I had to dad... I just reacted."

Kara took a deep breath, wishing she could fly off, avoid the rest of the conversation... But she couldn't, for multiple reasons.

"You're her friend-"

"I was her friend," Alex interrupted, "We're not friends anymore."

BEEP BEEP BEEP

"Really?" Alex muttered as she picked up her phone, setting down the still full glass, "I have to get to work."

Kara turned to see Alex stand up and move around, picking up her stray things before making her way back to Kara.

"We'll finish this later," Alex said and hugged Kara before heading to the door.

"Alex," Kara called out as she turned to the door, still on her couch. Alex paused, turning back to her sister, "I love you."

Alex smiled- and again she's the most beautiful sight on the planet-, "Love you too," and walked through the door, closing it behind her.

Kara turned back, staring at the empty room around her, her eyes falling on Alex's drink...

She needed a drink herself.

0000

End

To be honest, I like the twist of Alex forgetting who Kara is, but I don't understand why they handled Alex's relationship with Supergirl so badly. Even without knowing its Kara, with everything they have been through, they should have been friends.

So this was me, trying to put context of what they gave us. Hope you like.

As for the Non thing. As I've said in my other fics, Kara says she never killed, thus we can conclude that Non is still alive, even though they never mention him again. Kara didn't even say Non was dead when she told Alura that Astra was dead. And since we don't see him when the earth's atmosphere is laced with kryptonite, I'm going to make it my Headcanon that Kara convinced people to let her take Non to Argo.


End file.
